12 Tips for Success in Memory Care
- Using re-engaging techniques and offerings VS the word NO when exit seeking.
Examples: Yes, we can go outside but first let’s walk to your apartment to get a sweater for you or yes, you can go outside, but since it’s chilly, let’s have a cup of coffee or cocoa to warm up first.
Purpose: Shift attention away from distressing or inappropriate behavior.
- Offer a snack, drink, or favorite item.
- Start a new activity (puzzle, folding towels, looking at a photo album).
- Use sensory items (fidget blanket, stress ball, textured fabric).
- Validation & Gentle Agreement
Purpose: Acknowledge their emotions without correcting their reality.
- Say: “I can see you’re upset. That sounds hard,” instead of “That’s not true.”
- Avoid arguing or trying to reason—it can increase agitation.
Example:
If someone insists, they need to pick up their kids, respond:
“You must be a wonderful parent. Tell me more about your children.”
- Engage the Senses
Purpose: Stimulate calming or enjoyable feelings.
- Use calming music, aromatherapy, or familiar smells (baking, flowers).
- Touch: warm blanket, hand massage, or soft textures.
Example:
Play a familiar song from their youth to bring comfort and distract from agitation.
- Use Familiarity & Reminiscence
Purpose: Tap into long-term memory, which remains stronger in dementia.
- Show family photos, favorite books, or familiar objects.
- Ask open-ended questions about the past: “What was your favorite holiday growing up?”
- Change the Environment
Purpose: Remove or reduce triggers that may cause confusion or distress.
- Move to a quieter room or area with less stimulation.
- Remove confusing signs or mirrors if they’re causing distress.
- Adjust lighting or noise levels.
- Reorient with Kindness
Purpose: Gently guide them back to the present, if appropriate.
Use clocks, calendars, and routine cues to reduce confusion.
If asking about someone who has passed, say something comforting like,
“They’re not here right now, but you’re safe and I’m here with you.”
- Provide a Purpose or Task
Purpose: Give them a sense of usefulness and engagement.
- Folding laundry, sorting objects by color or shape, watering plants.
- These don’t have to be necessary tasks, just something meaningful.
Example:
If pacing or restless, say: “Can you help me carry these towels?”
- Use a Mirror Technique
Purpose: Reflect their feelings and provide empathy.
- If someone is angry, remain calm and reflect their emotion back:
“You sound upset. I would feel that way too.
- Give Time and Space
Purpose: Let agitation or confusion pass naturally.
- Don’t push too hard; sometimes, stepping away for a few minutes helps.
- Maintain a calm presence and return later with a new approach.
- Body Language and Tone
Purpose: Communicate safety and calm through nonverbal cues.
- Use a calm, reassuring tone.
- Maintain open body posture and avoid sudden movements.
- Smile, nod, and make gentle eye contact.
- Dining in Memory Care
Purpose: Healthier snack options:
- Carrot coins
- Hummus
- Peanut butter
- Protein shakes
- Protein puddings
- Half sandwiches
You can also cook carrot coins, then chill them, so they are cold for a dip, but softer than uncooked carrots.
General Guidelines
- Soft & Moist: Avoid dry, crumbly, or sticky foods.
- Easy to Swallow: Use pureed, mashed, or pudding-like textures.
- High in Nutrients: Dementia patients may forget to eat or lose weight, so snacks should be calorie-dense with healthy fats, protein, and vitamins.
- Finger-Friendly (if safe): For those who struggle with utensils, finger foods can help—if chewing and swallowing are still functional.
- Avoid Choking Hazards: Steer clear of nuts, popcorn, raw vegetables, dry crackers, or tough meats.
Soft/Pureed Snack Ideas
Protein-Rich Options
- Greek yogurt (plain or fruit-flavored) – add a drizzle of honey or blended fruit
- Cottage cheese with soft fruit puree (e.g., peach, pear)
- Soft scrambled eggs with a bit of cream cheese for smoothness
- Silken tofu smoothie with banana, berries, and nut butter
- Puréed beans or hummus (if tolerated) – served warm with soft bread or alone
Fruits & Vegetables (Soft Textures)
- Applesauce or blended stewed fruits (pears, peaches)
- Mashed banana or avocado – can be mixed with yogurt or nut butter
- Soft roasted vegetables, mashed – e.g., sweet potato, carrots, squash
Carbs & Comfort Foods
- Oatmeal or cream of wheat – enriched with milk, nut butter, or pureed fruit
- Pudding or custard – can be made with added protein (e.g., protein powder or eggs)
- Mashed potatoes – add olive oil or butter for extra calories
- Rice pudding or semolina with soft texture
Hydration-Boosting Snacks
- Gelatin with pureed fruit (use thickened liquids if needed)
- Fruit smoothies made with yogurt or kefir (thickened as needed)
- Milkshakes or fortified drinks (e.g., Ensure, Boost, or homemade)
For Those Who Can Tolerate Slightly More Texture
Always confirm swallowing ability with a speech-language pathologist.
- Mini muffins soaked in milk or tea (moisten before serving)
- Soft cheese wedges with smooth crackers or soft bread
- Well-cooked pasta with soft cheese or blended sauce
- Soft pancakes or French toast, moistened with syrup or fruit puree
Foods to Avoid (for those at risk of choking)
- Raw fruits/veggies like apples, carrots, celery
- Dry or crumbly baked goods
- Nuts, seeds, popcorn
- Tough or dry meats
- Sticky chunky peanut butter (unless thinned/mixed)
- Crackers, chips, hard crusted bread
Special Tips
- Familiar flavors help with recognition and appetite
- Bright colors (natural) are more appealing
- Small portions prevent overwhelm
- Routine snacks (same time, familiar foods) reduce confusion
- Finger foods can help in early stages, but not if swallowing is compromised
- Staff education for framing MC language
- Use the words “re-engage” VS “redirect”
- Use the words “ Enhanced Care” or “Memory Care neighborhood” VS “dementia unit, Alzheimer’s unit”
- Use the words “assisted dining room” VS “feeder or feeding dining room”
Kim Mead, AAS, ADC, CDP, CMDCP
Senior Regional Director of Engagement Gardant Management Solutions
NAAP Leadership Team
